frustrating times

Hello there, long time no see! I get alot of questions both about my illness, my current state and why i havn't been bloging.. ;) So i figured it's time to update a bit. 
So, to answer the biggest questions I get; Im not well yet and I have no idea right now when Im gonna be good to go again. If you read about pleurisy on the internet and talk to normal doctors it says 2 weeks of total rest and you'll be good to live normal again pretty much. Though, living normaly for a pro cyclist or any athlete for that matter is not really living normal in that sense. I have tried so hard to get tests done and find out if there is anything else wrong with me, even been tested for twar for example since it's been over two months now. It has all been negative (luckily) and it looks like I "only" have pleurisy.
A friend of mine in my local club is an abulance driver and than knows alot of doctors. He got me in contact with a lung specialist. He told me you can have sympthoms for six months from this illness and it's the exact symthomps I have. Heavy cheast or pain in the pleura when my pulse goes to high. He also got me another lung scan to see what it looks like, that was last week and Im waiting for the answers on that now, which I probably get in a couple of days. 
As some might have seen on instagram and twitter, I do exercise a little bit. As much as I feel my body can really. My problem, as I said, is my pulse can't go over 140 if I don't want pain for a while around the lung. So Im trying to take long walks and short bike rides. Can also do pretty good gym sessions which is importent so that my legs can get some work done for real. All is pulse controlled and that makes it easier to get the most out of the training. 
It is a very frustrating situation, to come from a winter where I have never felt stronger at that time of year and when finally get to race, something is wrong. When I finally know what it was, thinking it'll only take a few weeks until I can race again (which in itself was hard). Than having to chance my focus and goals pretty much every week. Now I know, it will take time and I have to really listen to my body, carefully, and I have accepted that this season is not gonna happen for me. I still hope I can race something before the season is over though, but my first focus is to get well. It is a part of the sport and it is these kind of things that builds mental strenght. It makes it even more clear what I want. I am motivated as h*** to get back better than before to next year. It will be hard work, but with focus and motivation it will happen.
Im trying to help my body to get healthy in all ways I can, I have changed a few things and hoping it will atleast help a bit. One thing I've done is, I've stopped eating wheat, which I've done once before and it does make a differens to how my body works. It's not totaly easy to just stop since they have it in almost everything! When traveling it's very inconvenient but now that I am home it's an easy thing to do to help my body a bit on the way. That together with sleep is two very importent things right now. 
Im keeping positive (most of the time) and have alot of great support from friends, team and ofcourse the biggest support, my family. It has been importent and will always be, Im greatful for all the pep and help!♥ I'll be back stronger, much becouse of you!
Can get this happy from riding in shorts in Sweden for the first time in months!